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Pros and Cons: Couture, Lesnar and random nonsense

CON: Randy Couture. Not that I don’t want to see him fight, it’s just as though he gave up. He realized certain fights and certain contracts weren’t happening and he crawled back, let’s not kid ourselves. Couture realized he was beaten and wants to come back for one or two big paydays and that is that. This isn’t about champion vs. interim champion. This isn’t about #1 vs. #2. This is about Couture getting big money to beat down Brock Lesnar. Or as Couture is quoted here by Lorreta Hunt, “I know (Emelianenko) expressed interest in this fight,” Couture told reporters Tuesday, “but I think if people are to take him seriously and give him credit as the number-one heavyweight in the world, then he needs to come fight me. That makes sense to me.” Yeah, beating Tim Sylvia in 30 seconds proved nothing. He needs to come to your house under your rules after you balked. Give me a break. Fedor is not signing with the UFC whether it’s because he’s demanding too much or because the UFC won’t give him a one-fight contract. You pretty much just wasted a year of life but you’ve lost all leverage in calling out Emelianenko.

CON: Brock Lesnar. Or to be more specific he said in the conference call, “who gives a s*** about Fedor?” Well Brock, around the globe a great number of people who give less of a “s***” about you. When the fight is over please tell me, like Shaq, how Couture’s ass tastes.

CON: Rampage’s situation. Why do so many people feel the need to defend him on a daily basis? As I said in the comments, if he hit your mother with his monster truck you’d certainly feel differently. Why do we care so much about criminals and not victims in this society? I don’t even care if he was crazy; if you’re crazy who cares what punishment you get? He still hurt people. I LOVE Rampage, I really do, but to blindly defend him in this situation is just stupid to me. He hurt people and damaged property and deserves to be punished regardless of the reason. I agree with Adam Morgan’s editorial and what happens when he’s off his rocker a second time?

CON: Yamma Pit Fighting. It’s been almost 5 months and still no second event? I HAVE YOUR T-SHIRT! Yes, I even wear it sometimes late at night when I walk my dog. Especially on nights like tonight when I forgot my usual Monday morning trash day won’t happen due to Labor Day and apparently I’m the only dumb person on the block that forgot about it. That’s just embarrassing on a neighborhood level. Then you have to do that walk of shame the next morning and drag it back into the garage. And screw you YAMMA, again, I have your shirt. I can’t imagine you’re out of business what with your brilliant marketing, super duper cage creation and dozens of grade A fighters. Not buying it!

CON: Rachelle Leah info. We heard there were rumors she was posing for Playboy and since then I’ve heard nothing else. Not fair, I demand a follow up as this was perhaps the best news of 2008. I’ve seen thousands of women naked (only because of the internet) but I haven’t been this excited to see one girl naked since…. actually never. I love Rachelle Leah. Naked girls are naked girls but Rachelle Leah is one of a kind. I need more information and frankly I’m angry at the lack of it. For all of the terrible little MMA sites out there shouldn’t there be a website dedicated to this one story?

PRO: Coaches winning gold medals. My last Pros and Cons was an Olympic edition and one thing I didn’t stress was the fact Olympic coaches don’t get gold medals. From Coach K in basketball to a gymnastics coach, coaches win nothing for their efforts. That’s either awesome or terrible, I’m not sure. People that bust their butts to teach as well as they can (say diving or gymnastics) probably deserve one but people that just coach (say baseball or water polo) probably don’t. It’s a slippery slope but you’d think they would get a trophy or something.

CON: Barbara Warren’s death. This amazing woman died last week. If I may quote a part of her obituary, “Warren….finished a triple Ironman in France that included a 7.2-mile swim, 336-mile bike ride and 78.6-mile run.” A TRIPLE IRONMAN!?!? I was not aware that was possible. A 79 mile run? I’m in better shape than 90% of Americans and I can run maybe 2 miles. It’s possible to run 79 miles in a row and not be Kenyan.. or dead? Not to mention a 336 mile bike ride? And a swim? This might be the most unbelievable thing I’ve ever read. I asked a Marine friend of mine if he could run 80 miles in a day and he said yes. I offered him a large prize if he could run 80 miles in 20 hours and he said no because, “I’m not in shape.” Who the hell can run 80 miles? I’m not trying to make a challenge here, that is just ridiculous. I’m sure SOMEONE can but it can’t be healthy for you.

PRO: Fox’s COPS special. They ran a 20th anniversary episode of the show again on Saturday. I’ve always said COPS might be the best show ever and I feel a 24 hour COPS network would be fantastic. Who can forget the black couple that got in the food fight and were covered in flour? The guy that was on LSD and ran naked through the barber shop? What about the big girl that came at them with a knife and stabbed herself? Or that cop with one leg that chased the dude down, tackled him and then mocked him for getting caught by an amputee? All of the best all in one night. I did not deserve that level of awesome and I could watch it over and over again.

CON: Kimbo/Rogers crap talk. Can someone please hire me to talk trash? This might be the worst back and forth trash talk I’ve ever seen. Kimbo’s camp is all, “this man used to have an honest job!” and Rogers camp is all, “MARIJUANA SUBTELTY!” I could do 10x better than that off the cuff, someone please call me. I think we’re less than a week away from a rap battle of yo momma jokes.

PRO: Jason Lambert down to 185lbs. As I’ve said before I think he could make 135lbs if he wanted. I really like Jason Lambert but his awkward, tiny dinosaur with the pot belly was not suited for 205lbs. Best of luck on Saturday sir.

PRO/CON: This UFC HW Title situation. First of all the obvious fight is champion Couture vs. interim champion Nogueira. We can all understand the return of Couture to get the rust off and make a huge money fight. So the winner of this fight better face the winner of Nog/Mir or it’s a complete farce. What if the younger, stronger Lesnar manages to beat Couture? I assume he’d face Nog to unify the titles but would the UFC really make that fight knowing Nog can take a freakish beating and still pull a submission from nowhere? There are way too many things that can go wrong here and it’s why you never try to book matches in advance.

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