Simply The Best: Michael “The Voice” Schiavello
On this New Years Eve while I’m still disoriented and shaky from an entire evening spent covering the memorable “Dynamite!! 2009” card, I just wanted to raise my virtual glass to the man I consider to be, as Tina Turner would put it, “Simply the Best” fight commentator in the business.
As an extremely longtime fan of the sport I know as well as any that getting adjusted to hearing a particular voice talking over fights you’re trying to concentrate on can be an acquired taste, and that’s putting it gently. Well I am here to tell you in all honesty that I have acquired a taste for the knowledgeable and witty commentary from the Australian based Michael Schiavello.
The king of the one liners, you may know Michael as the enthusiastic voice screaming “It’s goodnight Irene!!” following any number of the most brutal knockouts in the sport that have recently been aired on HDNet and scores of other media outlets worldwide.
Anyone that had the pleasure to sit through all seven plus hours of the live “Dynamite!! 2009″ event that Schiavello took the spot as lead commentator along with Jason “Mayhem” Miller and “Sexy Beast Number One” Guy Mezger can attest to the fact that “The Voice” never missed a beat from the first minute to the last hour.
Below is a selection of some of the very best one-liners from one of the most unique and charismatic commentators in sports broadcasting, period. Enjoy…
“He’s fought Sapp, Hong-Man, and word is next he’s going to be fighting a humpback whale” – on Ikuhisa Minowa
“He’s got more submissions than a high school newspaper” – on Minowa Man
“That put a kabosh, in the big kabosh” – on Minowa knockout
“Shimada’s going to be breathing through the back of his neck courtesy of that left hand of Noiri” – following a big punch that bloodied the nose of Shimada
“Omigawa tickled the testicles of the judges when he was awarded with a split decision over Marlon Sandro at Sengoku 9″ – on Michihiro Omigawa’s controversial split “must decide” decision victory in the Sengoku featherweight GP semifinals
“When it goes to the ground he gets tapped more times than Tiger Woods in Booty Call” – on Melvin Manfhoef
“It just looks wrong on so many levels” – on the wheelbarrow defense employed by Kazunori Yokota against Tatsuya Kawajiri
“Because that’s a replay we really want to see in slow motion” – when the knee to the testicles of Yoshida is shown is extreme slo-mo
“He’ll be wearing his balls as earrings after that one. Return those to Tiffany’s” – in reference to the knee to the groin of Yoshida from Ishii
Cory Brady is the managing editor of FiveOuncesOfPain.com, along with being a regular feature writer with Ultimate MMA Magazine. You can follow him on Twitter at http://twitter.com/corybrady
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Weak-Sauce.
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Weak-Sauce.
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When I first heard him I admit I wasnt a fan at all but over the last year that I have had Hdnet and been listening to him I have definatly become a fan of tne voice, he is much more knowledgeable than I thought at first and most of his sayings are really making me laugh, espacially the banter about Yoshidas nuts, it was 7 am here but I was laughing hard enough to wake up the kids(which is a bad idea during christmas break).
Hot debate. What do you think?
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His ability to segway from one liner to quality commentary is unparalleled. He knows a lot about the ground transitions and is well versed in striking. He never misses a beat. He incorporates all the hardcore forum fan jokes and gives shout outs to the online community.
His voice rises and falls with the intensity of the crowd. He’s the gorilla monsoon of MMA commentary.
I wear my two watches with pride, I support “The Voice”
Well-Done.
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He’s got similes like a grammar school textbook.
Schiavello FTW.
I like Joe Rogan too though. Thumbs down all you want, haters. His standup comedy rules too.
Well-Done.
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The Voice and Rogan are both great! I love Schiavello’s one-liners! Here are a couple more from the Dynamite show…
“He’s got more combinations than a Las Vegas slot machine.”
“He puts the end in Legend”
Rogan’s not really the one-liner type, but he’s also bloody hilarious, and usually half-stoned by the end of each show. (Watch for the glazed over eyes during the final wrap-up this weekend.)
I want their job!
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He is so aggressively terrible. I thought it was obvious. “Good night Irene????”. I can’t believe he tickles your testicles. There is such a thing as trying to hard.
Hot debate. What do you think?
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I agree completely and am actually shocked to see this article. It is very typical for Americans (which I am a proud one) to hate and bash Anything that sounds different. Just like Yankees laugh at the Southerners and vice versa. It is a very closed minded perspective.
I am fortunate to have worked with International clients for the past 10 years from France, Australia, England, Japan, and China. The various accents are very entertaining and I have found it takes just a little bit of effort to come to understand everything they say. However, I have had many coworkers (former) that failed to put forth that tiny bit of effort and just said “I can’t understand them” over and over til they quit or lost their jobs!
A good example of this was the TUF season with the Brits agains the USA. Most of them were very understandable, but there were several USA guys that just never tried to understand them. Others on the team you could see came to understand them very well a few episodes in.
Michael Schiavallo is very knowledgable. He keeps up with ALL the prominent MMA promotions, as well as K-1 worldwide. He probably knows more fighters records and histories than anyone here! His commentating is by far the best of any sport, truly the Marv Albert of MMA (without the biting
Well-Done.
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Michael “The Voice” Schiavello has more lines than a glass coffee table at Gary Buseys house…
Awww come on,can you do better?
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Weak-Sauce.
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I assume you mean Mike Goldberg? Come on man… The Voice knows his stuff, and his humor is really brilliant if you can get the swing of it. It’s not American, but that’s refreshing sometimes – just because it wasn’t grown in your back yard doesn’t mean it’s not funny. As far as the fighters he commentates for… yes, that absolutely reflects on him, because we ALL know the commentators get to actually pick the fights…. seriously, man, grow up. Schiavello’s just trying to make his living, just like you or me. If you were paying me what he probably makes to commentate a fight, I’d commentate a hermit crab wrestling match and love every minute of it.
Schiavello’s a good dude. I sent him a friend request on Facebook, just for fun… and he accepted. That alone surprised me, but more than that… despite the fact that he’s got hundreds upon hundreds of friends on there, he actually responds to people individually. I’ve had some conversations with him via message and just on threads that have sprung from his status and link updates. Back at the K-1 GP finals he posted a message saying that if you sent your full name, location, and pick for the fight, he’d try to give you a shout out during the broadcast. Lo and behold, he actually did. I almost fell off of my couch when he mentioned me by name about 15 minutes in to the broadcast, as I honestly didn’t expect a thing.
He’s charismatic, knowledgeable, connected in the community, and he cares about his fans and fans of the fight world. The Voice is for real, and has quickly become my favorite commentator – yes, even over Rogan.
And hey… anything’s better than the CBS announcing team, right?
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He replies to me on twitter. We talk on facebook occasionally. The internet shoutouts are pretty awesome when he does them. Extremely humble and down to earth.
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He is good but jokes a little too much for me. It is a fight not stand up comedy. I live in Australia so I hear a lot of him and I like him but his “he is taking more hits that a Pamela Anderson web site” stuff gets to be too much after a while. Having said that I like him but not as lead just as co -commentator. If he just came in every so often with a joke it would be good but there is kind of a …jokey atmosphere the whole time.
“The various accents are very entertaining ” well I’m pleased the way we talk “entertains” you. That is kinda patronizing dude.
Best commentating team= Roegan, Goldberg as main commentators and post fight interviewers with Bas and Schiavello as co-commentators and pre fight interviewers along with personalities like Randy, Mayhem, Mir, Shamrock as guests.
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Part of his genius is that he has the presence of mind to pass the spotlight when necessary…
During Gono’s amazing entrance – “Extraordinary as always.
I don’t know Mayhem ,does that beat the dancing Schoolgirls you had at Dreams 2009?”
Mayhem – ” I gotta say,as a fellow showman,I am seething with jealousy right now.”
In a perfect world,Schiavello will be co-hosting with Rogan and Goldie in Sydney,Australia in February.
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MMA-LOGIC
Any chance you’ll be seeing Big Nog vs. Velasquez live?
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