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The Scorecard – UFC 140: Jones vs. Machida

The Scorecard hits the highs and lows of the latest big event offering in MMA. Points are assigned completely at random but stay between ten and negative ten because I hate math.

Fans in Toronto aren’t used to seeing winners. The Maple Leafs haven’t made the playoffs since 2004, the Raptors since 2008, and the Blue Jays since 1993. So it had to be a little shocking to fans in T.O. to witness what they witnessed this past Saturday night. They saw, not only one of the best UFC events of the year, but a couple of moments that won’t be forgotten in the fight world anytime soon. At least for one night, it was good to be a sports fan living in Toronto.

Lets go to the UFC 140 Scorecard:

*I’m a fan of John Cholish because he’s a fan of Gossip Girl. PLUS ONE

*Anyone that comes out to “Highway to the Danger Zone” from Top Gun is pretty cool in my book. Kudos to you Mitch Clarke. PLUS ONE

*It didn’t seem like Cholish threw a lot in the fight, but every time he threw he seemed to connect. Good accuracy. PLUS THREE

*An excellent scramble by Cholish prior to the finishing sequence. He went for a couple of submissions before taking the back, flattening out Clarke, and getting the stoppage. PLUS FOUR

*Props to Jake Hecht for not only coming out to “Won’t Back Down” by Eminem but also mouthing the lyrics on his way to the cage. I bet Tito was pissed someone else used an Eminem song on this card. PLUS TWO

*And Rich Attonito decided to mouth his walk out song, “Long Tall Sally” from Predator, as well. Seems to be a great night for walk-out music. PLUS ONE

*Some sick and powerful elbows by Hecht. I thought they might have been to the back of the head at first, but they were just extremely well placed. Big win for Hecht over a guy like Attontio, who is a solid hand. PLUS THREE

*Mark Bocek looks like Gray Maynard and he fought like him as well. Not an impressive performance from “the best grappler in the lightweight division.” MINUS THREE

*Somehow this fight will be changed to a draw so Nik Lentz remains undefeated in the UFC. MINUS ONE

*Everyone wrongfully says that Greg Jackson turns fighters boring but I think we should start pointing fingers at Firas Zahabi. MINUS TWO

*Three fights in and still no Brittney Palmer walking the cage? Shame on you UFC production staff. MINUS TWO

*Ah, maybe they were just saving Brittney for TV. Good job UFC production staff. PLUS TWO

*Wait, Mike Goldberg called Brittney “beautiful.” He only knows two adjectives but has to describe three ladies. SOMEONE HELP THIS MAN! MINUS THREE

*Very good first round of action between Yves Jabouin and Walel Watson. Pretty much expected considering both men are quick and creative strikers. PLUS THREE

*See what I mean? Goldberg called Arianny Celeste “beautiful” as well. Seriously, someone get him a thesaurus for Christmas. MINUS THREE

*Although the rest of the fight wasn’t as good as the first round, Yves Jabouin vs. Walel Watson was fun and competitive. Good job by both guys. PLUS THREE

*Of course the judges find a way to screw things up and give it to Jabouin via staying on the outside and nearly getting choked out twice. MINUS FOUR

*Nice job by Jabouin trying to throw his hat into the crowd only for it to hit the cage. MINUS TWO

*As always with guys who miss weight, I’m docking one point for every pound over the maximum limit. Since Dennis Hallman was 2.5 over, I’m just going to round up. MINUS THREE

*Come on John Makdessi, you can’t be grabbing the fence like that. MINUS FOUR

*Well now we know why Makdessi was grabbing the cage. He couldn’t do a thing with Dennis Hallman on top of him. MINUS FOUR

*Even though he missed weight, that was a dominant performance by Hallman. Credit to him for making short work of Makdessi. PLUS FOUR

*I don’t know about Hallman staying at lightweight, but at least he recognized that his victory is a bit hollow because he missed weight. PLUS TWO

*Movember might be over but don’t tell that to Jared Hamman. That was a manly mustache he was sporting. PLUS ONE

*You know what sucks about so many fights being on ION besides the fact that they’re not in HD? They don’t show the fight walk outs, which really limits my analysis in these columns. MINUS THREE

*Hamman might be able to take a punch, but being known for an outstanding chin and heart just means you get hit way too much. MINUS TWO

*Excellent performance and finish by Constantinos Philippou. He didn’t blow himself up trying to finish on the ground. He stayed patient, let Hamman up, and kept putting it down. PLUS FOUR

*Extra points to Philippou for his power and instincts. PLUS THREE

*Joe Rogan said, “Jones is easily the most dominant champion in the UFC next to Anderson Silva.” Jones has defended his title once and did Rogan just forget about Georges St. Pierre? MINUS FOUR

*And Goldberg makes me throw up by saying that Jones can become the Michael Jordan of MMA. MINUS SEVEN

*Krzysztof Soszynski vs. Igor Pokrajac was fun while it lasted, but it didn’t last long. PLUS FOUR

*That was some scary stuff by Pokrajac. He landed one shot that rocked Soszynski and then swarmed on him until he was out. PLUS FIVE

*Bad stoppage by Yves Lavigne though, who let it go on a bit too long. MINUS TWO

*How could they not interview Pokrajac after that performance? If it was just to get Bocek vs. Lentz on TV then that’s a complete joke. Any fighter who finishes a fight should be interviewed, especially a fighter who finishes a fight in 35 seconds. MINUS FIVE


*Dana White says, “Tito wants to go out with a win. If he wins, he’ll probably fight again.” That doesn’t make sense Dana. MINUS TWO

*Of course Chan Sung Jung comes out to “Zombie” by Cranberries. PLUS TWO

*Even though “Coming Home” by Diddy is over-used, at least it makes sense when Mark Hominick uses it in Toronto. Also, it should prevent Jones from using it in the main event. PLUS THREE

*Wow, who the hell saw that coming? A seven second KO by Jung. PLUS SEVEN

*Extra points to Jung for that finish. Great job slipping, countering, and swarming on Hominick. Just incredible. PLUS FIVE

*Even more points to Jung for tying the official record for fastest UFC KO. PLUS SEVEN

*Any man that comes out to Garth Brooks is a great man. You’re a great man Brian Ebersole. PLUS THREE

*I have to take away point from Ebersole for shaving “Tapout” into his chest though. That was just wrong. MINUS TWO

*That said, props to the man for finding a new way to get paid. PLUS ONE

*Ever since Jason High used “All of the Lights” as his walk out song, it became very overused. Still a good song though, so I can’t hate on Claude Patrick. PLUS ONE

*Good on Rogan for giving Duane Ludwig his credit for the fastest KO. We all know he’s the true record holder. PLUS TWO

*The less said about Ebersole vs. Patrick, the better. It was a slow and lackluster fight. I thought the judges got it right, but I don’t think anyone really won that fight. MINUS FIVE

*Deducting more points because that fight put a halt to this card, which was moving along nicely. MINUS FOUR

*”The guillotine is a myth,” says Ebersole. Somewhere Chael Sonnen agrees. Somewhere Team Alpha Male disagrees. MINUS FOUR

*So UFC showed Dion Phanuef, but didn’t show his girlfriend Elisha Cuthbert? Lame. MINUS THREE

*I have a feeling that Antonio Rogerio Nogueira doesn’t listen to Redman and Method Man on the regular, but I enjoy the walk out music. PLUS THREE

*Obviously I’m not a fan of Tito Ortiz, but I always give him credit for coming out to an Eminem track. PLUS TWO

*I’m taking off points for Bruce Buffer actually calling Tito by his new nickname. MINUS FOUR

*Great start to Nogueira vs. Ortiz. Both guys came out swinging. PLUS THREE

*Great performance by “Lil Nog” He landed some brutal shots and it looked pretty clear that Tito wanted out of there after taking a barrage of body shots on the ground. PLUS FIVE

*Yes Joe, eye pokes are very common on the ground. That’s why Tito was wincing. MINUS THREE

*Extra points to Nogueira because he beat Tito, which always puts a smile on my face. PLUS THREE

*Not a fan of “Amazing” by Kanye West or Frank Mir still using it as his walk out song. MINUS TWO

*What a crazy fight between Antonio Rodrigio Nogueira and Mir. Mir was in trouble but somehow, not only survived, but submitted and broke the arm of Nogueira. Absoutely stunning finish. PLUS EIGHT

*Extra points to Mir for submitting Nogueira, which I thought was damn near impossible. PLUS TEN

*What a scary arm break for Nogueira. That one might be a career ender. EVEN

*Rogan gives Jones the edge in experience even though Machida has spent more time in the octagon and has more title fights. Can they please stop with these dumb segments? MINUS FOUR

*I still hate Lyoto Machida’s “Bleed It Out” mix. It’s probably the worst song mix in the UFC. MINUS THREE

*I stand corrected; Jon Jones might have the worst song mix in the UFC. MINUS FOUR

*Obligatory points for the obligatory Chuck Liddell mention. PLUS THREE

*Was Jones doing the moonwalk and dancing before the biggest fight of his life? That’s some confidence right there. PLUS TWO

*Great first round for Machida. He stayed patient, countered well, and picked his spots. Even though that I don’t really think he hurt Jones, he at least showed that he was going to make a fight of things. PLUS THREE

*Ok, Jones is a scary man. He easily took down Machida, who has above average takedown defense, cut him open, rocked him on the feet, and then choked him out with a standing guillotine. That’s a bad man right there. PLUS SEVEN

*Extra points to Jones, because seriously, that’s a bad man right there. PLUS SIX

*Goldberg said, “Jones survived the deep waters.” He lost the first round of a five round fight. Maybe Goldberg thought the fight was taking place in a kiddy pool. MINUS THREE

*I’m glad Rashad Evans wasn’t there to ruin Jones’ special night on Saturday. PLUS ONE

*Overall it’s pretty damn hard to be disappointed by UFC 140. All the big fights delivered, we got some brutal stoppages, and some memorable moments. PLUS TEN

Final Score: 49

For a more in-depth look at UFC 140, plus a preview of this weekend’s Strikeforce event, make sure to check out tomorrow’s Five Ounces of Podcast with Samer Kadi and myself.


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